Becoming a housewife?

i came accross a very interesting article written by Maria Zain in Forward magazine (Issue 41, Nov 2009); entitled The Dying Birth Rate - and its abstract debate.

i will not be nagging about how exactly men and women are responsible for the declining birth rate, etc, but i would like to share a very interesting point that really caught my attention..

"for women who want to stay at home for the sake of their children, they should be allowed to, without being belittled or marginalised. feminists have been busy campaigning for equal rights to education and employment. so women should have the equal rights to be home-makers if they wish to be" Maria Zain

being forced to go to work
i heard too many opinions regarding this issue from my colleagues. and don't be surprise if i can conclude that 3/4 of them have a dream of becoming a housewife. some may find it as the best way to find serenity, and the other may find it as a way out from their stressful life as a student (i.e. quit from studies, get married and stay at home. is it as simple as this?).

apparently, most women out there are being forced to go to work, especially due to the social expectation, where women should venture outside of their homes and search for employment. familiar with these statements?

"it's good to work"

"it's great to earn money, especially when you had already put all your effort in your studies. if you don't go to work, it will be such a waste."

"it's for your own good. at least you will have 'back up' if something happen to your spouse"


successful women are always seen as those depicted with flourishing careers, a late marriage and even later children. while women who stay at home, cook family meals and keep the house clean are perceived as uneducated and not have the qualification to get a job.

it's pretty pathetic that most of the women out there work because the surrounding expect them to work (not because of their own passion or interest). their parents expect them to work. their in laws expect them to work, the government expect them to work, and even sometimes the husband expect them to work as well. in short, women are being discouraged from taking care of their family home and their children.

make your own choice
it doesn't matter whether a woman goes to work or not. it is just a matter of how the woman play her roles effectively, either at the office or at home. it would be great if a woman can jump into the society, contribute her skills and wisdom for the betterment of the ummah; but to look down on those who stay at home, doing the full-time childbearing chores; is totally not a right thing to do. don't forget that the "good housewives" are the ones that contribute in creating a loving environment at home and producing more high quality human capitals to our nation for the next generation.

thus, we should not expect that every woman to go to work nor every woman should be a housewife because every individual is different, thus making every family unique. instead, make your own choice. figure out which will bring out the best within you. there is no right or wrong answer in this case. create better lines for open communication within the marriage so that you and your spouse will come to a
consensus to make the best decision.

credit to: http://humm-bintusoleh.blogspot.com/

p/s: hmmm...that's why for me i really hate the words expectation. People have expectation of what we should we become instead of asking what do we want to become?

yes...i'm nervous

People usually make mistakes when they are nervous. I usually tell people that. But i always thought that I have way past that stage cause i have been train how to get thorough those situation.

Unexpectedly yesterday i spell words wrongly because of my nervousness during my discussion with my supervisor . i still don't know why I'm so nervous every time i have meeting with my supervisor. She was nice and motherly type but somehow when she was in front of me i can't seem to speak fluently or correctly. I kept messing up my grammar and now even my spelling going haywire...

I even start questioning my proficiency because of the this incidents. Hopefully i can go through this situation somehow and maybe i will learned something from this experience.

know yourself better

* A very interesting result form personality test i took in facebook
* Of course i only agree about half of it..just nice to know

Dear Putri Mubina Sujak, below are your Personality Tests result:
Who is your true self: You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

* I never knew that i might be a moody type of person..hmmm

Your view on yourself:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are down-to-earth
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : People like you because you are so straightforward
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties

* Totally agree...hehe


The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You like serious
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Smart
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Determined people
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You don't judge a book by its cover
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : So good-looking people aren't necessarily your style
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes

* I don't think i'm an attractive person

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person
* Just let me meet my mr.right first...

The seriousness of your love:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : So you will find yourself with plenty of dates
*Honestly i never have a date

Your views on education:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Education is very important in life
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You want to study hard
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Learn as much as you can
* 100% true....

The right job for you:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You're a practical person
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Will choose a secure job with a steady income
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Knowing what you like to do is important
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Find a regular job doing just that
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You'll be set for life
* Maybe...

How do you view success:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are afraid of failure
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous
* Yup..maybe deep down in my heart

What are you most afraid of:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are concerned about your image
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : The way others see you
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : It's time for you to believe in who you are
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Not what you wear
* my degree of ignorance quite high actually

The teacher in you

* I think this is a good article to be read especially by teacher wannabe


TEACHER TALK
By NITHYA SIDDHU @The Star



Imparting knowledge and values to young children are by no means, easy tasks, but teachers remain in the profession for various reasons.

SINGER songwriter Bob Dylan once said: “A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and gets to bed at night, and in between, he does what he wants to do.” After reading this, I asked this question seriously of myself. As a teacher, do I get to do what I want to do?

The answer is yes. Well, at least 60% of the time. When I am teaching, I do know that I am doing what I want to do, which is to help others gain understanding of a subject that I have a passion for.

If my teaching gives students the impetus to bring about positive change in themselves, be it in deportment, knowledge or attitude, then I know I am doing what I want to do.

For the rest of the time, like most other teachers, I do what I have to do. Bob Dylan’s words made me think further. What questions, if any, have been asked of me regarding my years as a teacher?

Listed below are some of the questions and answers that are based on my 25 years of teaching.

·Do I get the time to be creative and be motivated?

By the administration, not always. By my students, quite a fair bit. I do realise this however – teachers do need and appreciate incentives to propel them to be inventive.

As for me, I have always tried to come up with an innovative project, at least once a year. I am aware that for this to happen – it is up to me to find the time for it. The inclination to do so is important. If it doesn’t happen, I am to blame.

·Is teaching rewarding?

I would say it has its moments, particularly if a lesson goes well and you know that you are instrumental in bringing about some positive learning habits.

l Is teaching addictive?

Yes, it can be something that you want to return to time after time, especially if you have the knack for it. Your students’ faces will say it all ... whether they enjoy your lesson or just your sheer presence every time you walk into the class.

·A girl asked me this: is a teacher’s job exciting?

On days when the factors are just right, the students are great, funny and eager to work with you – yes, it can be exciting to teach.

Their enthusiasm is infectious and creates this warm feeling that is hard to describe. When they understand your wit and are rooting for meaningful communication, teaching can become exciting.

On other days? Let’s face it, like any other job, sometimes it’s just doing more of the same every day — dreary, dull and uphill tasks — that physically and mentally tire you out. On days like this, you just want the working day to end, so you can go home.

·“Is teaching a gift?” asks an 18-year-old who plans to take up the noble profession.

My answer? I’m afraid it is. Many people are taken on as teachers, but only a few take to teaching like ducks to water.

Why? It’s a gift to be able to reach out to people, touch them where it matters, and make them see the whys and what-fors of notching up change.

·Is teaching challenging?

It used to be, but not as much anymore as I’ve matured over time. Any new challenge can be tackled. But when I was new to teaching, I do remember the rush I felt – there were always so many things to do, to learn, to think and to discover.

A young teacher said to me, “I am extremely happy to be a teacher, it’s good to see the students’ progress and it’s fantastic to see that I (and teachers in general) am an important part in their learning life.” It was a good statement, I thought.

·Do teachers make a difference?

A student answered this for me. “A good teacher makes me want to be a better per-son,” he said.

·Is teaching rewarding?

For this, I sought out a senior teacher – a man due to retire soon and his answer stayed with me.

“Financially, you may not feel you have the best job in the world. But it pays well enough, and if you’re grateful for the privileges that come with the job (he meant free medical services, loans at low interest rates, not having to work during school holidays, etc), I think teaching is a good job to derive a pension from.”

But, the true rewards are the non-tangible ones, he shared, that of providing a charitable service, giving to the young, being involved in their growing years.

What is truly rewarding is when former students come back years later to tell their teachers how they inspired and brought about positive changes to them, he added.

“You really leave a little piece of yourself with them, and they with you,” he said.

I was touched.

·Does being a teacher teach you anything?

My answer would be “loads”. I have learnt so much from being a teacher. There’ll never be an ending to what I can still learn. Mentoring, coaching, training, counselling skills – all these I learnt from teaching.

Being a more accepting person — less ready to condemn and more ready to forgive and move forward — all this, I learnt from teaching.

Practising the habit of being honest, non-prejudicial, just, fair, caring, kind — this too came as an added bonus.

Understanding myself, knowing how I was viewed by others and realising what I needed to do to improve every day came directly from my teaching experience too.

The most important thing I learnt? How you are as a person is reflected by the look on the faces of your students.

When you do a good job, you see the look of enlightenment and appreciation on them. When you care, they often care too. And, if you don’t, they couldn’t care less.

i miss these moments....

celebrating hari raya around KL



everyone is too busy now days following their own path

sanik doing master

rahma working at putrajaya

tola at lahad datu

sudir doing his practical teaching at Ampang, KL

lost contact with dula...but he graduated already from UM

almost forgot arvin in his final year at UIA

still i believe friendship can last forever...

E.L.F jjang

somehow i miss suju13 more today

It is easy to lose sight of what is important

Slow Dance
Have you ever watched kids
on a merry-go-around?
Or listened to the rain
slapping on the ground
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast
Time is short
The music won't last

# Somehow these words described my feelings
I have been too busy lately
Extremely tired
Assignments,classes, collecting data..
i know its normal for a final year students to be busy..
But i also want to create more beautiful memories with my friends
i want to cherish and hold on to this memories
Since its going to be hard to see each other after graduating